Season 1

Episode 1 - Pilot

Jay has just recently married his younger, Colombian wife, Gloria, but he's having trouble keeping up with her and her son Manny. Claire is having trouble with her own family, especially with her husband Phil, who thinks he can be hip with his three kids. Also, Mitchell and his partner Cameron adopt a Vietnamese baby, Lily.

Episode 2 - The Bicycle Thief

As Phil helps his son in showing Claire that he can be trusted with a brand new bike, Phil turns out to be the irresponsible one when he notices a hot neighbor. Meanwhile, Mitchell and Cameron bring Lily to their Mommy & Me class while Manny and Jay uncomfortably spend some father and son time together.

Episode 3 - Come Fly With Me

Phil pushes Jay to go out with him and fly his new model plane. While Manny takes time out to play with Luke, Gloria accompanies Alex in shopping for a dress. Mitchell and Cameron goes shopping at Costco, but Mitchell feels that he is too good to shop there. Later on, Manny ends up having a heart-to-heart talk with his sister Claire.

Episode 4 - The Incident

Dede, Claire and Mitchell's mother, stops in for a surprise visit and wants to try to make up with everyone that she offended during "the incident" that she caused at Jay and Gloria's wedding. No one is eager to see her, but everything comes into play when the whole family meets at Claire's house for dinner.

Episode 5 - Coal Digger

The whole family is invited for some barbeque and football at Gloria and Jay's house. However, earlier at school there was an incident between Manny and Luke, making things very awkward for Claire and Gloria. Things heat up when an offensive label is uttered.

Episode 6 - Run For Your Wife

It's the first day of school for the families. With all of the kids gone, Phil misreads how Claire is dealing with the empty house. Jay and Gloria have a disagreement over Manny's choice of an outfit for his first day of school. Also, Mitchell and Cameron fret over Lily's health after Mitchell accidentally bumps her head into a doorway.

Episode 7 - En Garde

Manny becomes interested in fencing and the whole family comes out to cheer him on. However, with Jay being so interested in Manny's success at fencing, Mitchell's old childhood wound is triggered. Meanwhile, Phil tries to see if Luke has any hidden talents of his own.

Episode 8 - Great Expectations

Claire has had a history of giving bad gifts. So, she decides to give Phil a surprising anniversary present, which is a private performance by Izzy LaFontaine, one of their favorite musicians. However, this unexpected gift is unexpected in more than one way. Cameron and Mitchell call their party-girl friend, Sal, for a night on the town. Meanwhile, the kids are off at a sleepover at Jay and Gloria's, which Haley hopes to ditch to go to a party with Dylan.

Episode 9 - Fizbo

Phil and Claire throw Luke the biggest and best birthday that he could want. However, Cameron arrives as Fizbo, the clown, who triggers a chain of events that leads to someone ending up in the hospital.

Episode 10 - Undeck The Halls

The Dunphy kids are in trouble again, but this time Claire and Phil are threatening to take Christmas away. Gloria and Manny want to incorporate some of their Colombian practices into Jay's holiday traditions, but he wants to keep it his way. Meanwhile Cameron and Mitchell take Lily to the mall for her first picture with Santa, however this Santa isn't very jolly.
 

Episode 11 - Up All Night

With the arrival of Javier, Manny's unreliable father, there is tension between Gloria and Jay because of Jay's reaction towards his visit. Meanwhile, Claire has to rely on a sexy fireman in order to help Phil get to the hospital, which is due to his painful kidney stones. Elsewhere, Lily is being sleep-trained by Mitchell and Cameron, which is becoming more troublesome than they expected.

Episode 12 - Not In My House

Claire finds a dirty picture on the computer and assumes it was Luke's, and Phil, who was guilty, doesn't correct her. Meanwhile, Jay and Gloria argue about Jay's beloved life-sized dog butler statue. Elsewhere, Mitchell is annoyed by Cameron when he becomes more interested in the gardener's troubles than his own.

Episode 13 - Fifteen Percent

Mitchell makes Jay think that Shorty, an old friend, might be gay. Jay doesn't think it's true at first, but he begins to believe it after seeing several questionable signs. Meanwhile, Manny's date gets a makeover from Gloria. Elsewhere, Claire fights with Phil's universal remote.

Episode 14 - Moon Landing

Claire is upset to find that her friend Valerie is better than her. In the meantime Mitchell helps Gloria with legal issues and Jay had a hard time in the locker room.

Episode 15 - My Funky Valentine

Love is in the air and all the families are preparing for Valentine's Day. Claire and Phil are planning a special trip. Meanwhile, Jay decides to take Gloria to a comedy show for some entertainment. Also, Cameron and Mitchell try to help Manny out by playing Cupid.

Episode 16 - Fears

When Phil and Luke go underneath the house to see what they can find, Phil is challenged to overcome his fear of the dark. Meanwhile, Mitchell and Cameron freak out when Lily's first word is "Mommy," and Haley takes her driving test.

Episode 17 - Truth Be Told

Phil reconnects with an old high school girlfriend through Facebook and invites her over to the house, but things don't go as well as expected. Jay will stop at nothing to cover up his tracks when he accidentally kills Manny's pet turtle, and Mitchell, who feels extremely overworked, finally confronts his boss.

Episode 18 - Starry Night

Jay and Mitchell go on their traditional father-and-son outing to see the meteor showers, but Mitchell is upset when he finds out that Manny will be joining them. Cameron and Gloria spend some quality time together, with some minor incidents, while Phil and Claire both take on one of their child's school projects.

Episode 19 - Game Changer

It's Phil's birthday and there's a new product he wants coming out at the same time. Meanwhile, Mitchell decides to toughen up and Cameron talks to a neighbor about marital problems, but he gets too involved with the neighbor's stories.

Episode 20 - Benched

During an intense basketball game, Luke and Manny's coach quits, which leads to Jay and Phil stepping in to help out. Jay sets up Mitchell with an interview for a new job. Claire and Gloria bond over having had their children reveal they embarrass them.

Episode 21 - Travels With Scout

Phil's father shows up for a visit with an RV and a dog, making Claire believe that he is hiding a more serious reason for coming. Meanwhile, Cameron fills in as a drummer for Dylan's band, and Jay takes Manny to a horror movie that traumatizes him.

Episode 22 - Airport 2010

Gloria surprises Jay with a trip to Hawaii for his birthday, but he isn't pleased to find out that the entire family is tagging along. When everyone arrives at the airport, chaos ensues with forgotten identification, breaches of security, and flying phobias.

Episode 23 - Hawaii

Jay's plans to do nothing but relax on vacation are interrupted by an unwelcome reality check. Meanwhile, Phil tries to make the trip romantic for Claire, Mitchell and Cameron disagree on whether they should go sight-seeing, and the kids get themselves into trouble.

Episode 24 - Family Portrait

Claire makes an effort to take a new family portrait, but everybody is too busy to cooperate: Gloria and Manny go with Phil and Alex to a Lakers game and share an awkward moment on the jumbotron, Cameron gets a job as a wedding singer while Mitchell takes care of Lily and a stray pigeon, and Luke interviews Jay for a school project.